This is the best letter to Santa from Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer that I have ever written. No foolin'.
Dear Santa,
As part of my divorce settlement with Clarice (no prenup sadly), she gets 50% of my trademarked name. She will take "Rudolph the R," and I will heretofore be known as "Ed Nosed Reindeer."
Sorry for any confusion.